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Dealing With The Hate

Often I'm asked, "How do you deal with the hate?" Many of you will ask this during my live sessions. Perhaps a recent "clapback" video, or just the general trolls that like to cause a disturbance in my lives, prompts you. Don't worry, I'm always happy to answer. Mental health is very important to me. Thus being an outspoken advocate for society's acceptance of depression and anxiety is something I hold close to my heart. This acceptance is extremely important in the black community. Growing up, I lacked that acceptance. Like many of you, I was always given the "pray about it," line. To this day, that phrase fills me with frustration. It's dismissive. Belittling. EMPTY.

So, what do I do? I feel. Now, I realize that this sounds easy. I assure you it is not. In some capacity or another, we've all been taught to not express our emotions. As someone who suffers from bipolar disorder, I have no choice. As a parent and a responsible adult, I healthily express my emotions. This may come as a surprise, but I enjoy knitting, reading, writing, and watching shows that take me out of reality. It's an escape that I desire. Romance novels are my favorite. I'm sure a lot of you probably cringed, but the silliness of them is helpful for me. Spending time with my daughter is number one, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't need to decompress after that as well. Gaming is another way that I relieve some stress. I recently purchased an Oculus, and I've been utilizing it as often as I can. My goal is to do one relaxing activity a day. It can be difficult to find the time, but I must do it. It keeps me sane and motivated.

Either way, the trolls can be amusing, and they can also be annoying. However, it's how you choose to respond that defines you. I like to laugh at their expense. I have no shame in shaming those that attempt to shame me. Why should I? If you swing at me, you better not miss. You can guarantee, I'm going to swing back and you won't like the result. I encourage all of you to do the same. Decompress. Find time for yourself in this crazy world.


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